Thursday, February 27, 2014

Where is the Understanding???

I sat down to post on Cortlynn's 13th birthday and actually decided to postpone that for a day or two and write about something else.
 
On Monday morning the community experienced a huge loss:  a mom, a dad, and two brothers (ages 12 and 14) passed away at their home due to a Carbon Dioxide leak from a faulty water heater.  I didn't "personally" know them but felt so sad when I found out.  The family had two older children; 1 girl and 1 boy---both currently serving LDS missions.  When I discovered the ages and I saw the house on the news-it's just up the road and we've taken the kids trick or treating there-I knew Cortlynn would know at least the younger boy.  I debated whether or not to pick her up from school-and decided to just let it be and if she needed to be picked up she would call me.  She came home and just sat on the couch: when I asked how she was doing she just broke down and cried.  I cried, not because I was mourning-but because Cortlynn was hurting. That was when I found out she knew both boys really well.  When she arrived at school a friend ran up to her and told her what had happened but she didn't believe it and went to class.  Once the bell rang--the principle came over the speaker and told the school (and teachers) the news.  Unfortunately I think that could have been handled differently-but too late now.
 
She has dealt with death before--but not of a friend-and here it was two friends.  Since she is on facebook and may read articles or reports on this I asked her to try not to read the comments.  I can't understand why people feel like they need to spew their negativity and hatred on social media for everyone, including family members and friends-to see and read.  Some of the comments were so hateful and mean....I can't even repeat them.....This was one of those days I really hated the minority of the human race.....so thankful there are just a few inconsiderate a-holes.
 
I believed this would protect her.....not the case.  On Tuesday night at dance, a girl who was best friends with the younger brother couldn't handle class and asked to be excused than proceeded to cry in the hall.  Cortlynn and a few other girls went out to try and comfort her.  That is when a mom came over and asked what was going on:  the girl-while crying-tells her that her best friend was one of the boys who passed away with his family.   The mom stepped back a little-looked at another girl and says something like, "Oh, right...I don't know what the big deal is, everyone dies"   
 
I wasn't there.....I really wish I had been.....Cortlynn and the other girls (including this woman's daughter)just looked at each other in disbelief while the crying girl ran out. 
 
How is this OK?????  I know this women and would have thought she would be more sensitive to 12/13 yr old girls.  For crying out loud 2 years ago she thru a crap fit over someone calling her daughter a lazy ass-----and she does this???  I honestly don't understand how people can be so heartless and uncaring.  When Cortlynn came home--I could tell something was bothering her, and when she told me and her dad-I became quite upset.  People just don't know how to treat one another and it makes me so sad.
 
There is a "memorial" on the front yard of the house and I asked Cortlynn if she felt like she needed to take something.  We went up last night for a few minutes and she was able to read the nice notes people have written and she left green flowers, green balloons, and a green candle (that was the boys' favorite color). 
 
She has decided to go to the funeral and I told her that is perfectly alright-and I will check her out of school for it. They are planning on the funeral to be huge and logistically--there is no place to hold it. Our Stake center isn't big enough-so they've decided to hold it at the larger Stake center up at the college---not just one, but both of them.  Since they are so close to each other (they share the same parking lot) I believe they will have a live remote for the other building.  I still don't know if that will be enough room---  

If there is anything positive that can come out of this horrible tragedy it would be the fact the entire community now fully understands the dangers of Carbon Monoxide poisoning and how important it is to have detectors in the home.  Every store (Lowes, Home Depot, Fred Meyer, etc) were sold out of the detectors by Monday night.  The shelves were empty and still are..Devin told me that they are trying to get more in from other Fred Meyer Stores.  Our home doesn't have one and I've been meaning to get one for months----this was a wake up call and I went online-ordered one from Amazon-and it arrived yesterday.  I still need to install it-but after reading the instructions, I will be buying several more.  I wouldn't want anything like this to happen to me or my family.

What an awful few days---the older children made it home on Monday night and are so strong.  I've read messages Sister Parrish has written and she is such a positive young women-I'm not even related to the family but I'm having a difficult time understanding the "whys"---I can't even believe how she and her brother are dealing with the deaths of their entire family, but they are still smiling.  If only the  buttholes who enjoy spreading their mean comments in the world and community could take note and be more of a positive and understanding influence.

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