Now that all the immediate family has been told and I am at 12 weeks----I feel comfortable enough to blog the fact we are expecting baby number 4. Our little bundle is due on Mother's Day-May 12-but since I've had the other three 7 days early, I am thinking I will have the baby on May 5.
We are all so excited to add to our family. When I told the kids last week Cortlynn hugged me and hopes that it is a girl, and Tristan lifted up my shirt, told me that he couldn't see anything, and informed me the baby better be a boy. Kyra is too young to understand-but I know she will love the baby when it is here.
I found out during one of the most difficult times in my life. The week I was out in Moore-dealing with grandpa's death and before grandma passed away-the conversation of having another baby came up more than once. I had even talked to my sister about a weird conversation I had with Devin about how I said our 4 kids and than wondered why I had said 4. Several people-relatives and friends asked me if we were going to have any more children. It is always so weird how a person's subconscious maybe knows things that you don't.
Three days after grandma's funeral and after my parents left my house to head back to Montana-I had a thought that maybe I should take a test---but with all the stress over the previous week-I thought that was my problem. I took the test and only had to wait 5 seconds before the results came back positive. I sat down on the bathroom floor and completely lost it. Not because I was upset I was expecting, but I think it was because of all the emotions from the prior days and knowing that some of my family wouldn't be "here" to celebrate.
I didn't tell Devin right away-I waited a few days and told him while we were at the fair for a concert. When I showed him the picture of the positive test-he actually thought my sister was pregnant. (sorry Heather) He couldn't believe it when I told him that it was me.
This pregnancy has been extremely difficult. I'm not sure if it is because I'm older or what-but it is kicking my butt. I'm beyond tired/fatigued, nauseous ALL THE TIME, really mean and irritable, dizzy, and I cry at a drop of a hat. I hope with the first trimester almost over, some of these symptoms will improve.
I hope people are excited for us, but I guess if they aren't-that is their problem. I realize Devin isn't as young as he was 12 years ago-but neither am I. We are good parents who enjoy and love our children and I don't think our age should be a factor in our happiness. Our children love us and they know that we will be there to support them in all they do. I'm sure some will have "snide" comments about it--and we will just grin and bare it-but WE are happy and WE are excited to complete our family.
