I can't believe I only have a little over 3 weeks until my due date. If this little girl is anything like her siblings-she will actually be here in a little over 2 weeks. CRAZY! This being my 4th child-I shouldn't be as anxious as I am; but I guess it doesn't matter how many children you have, you just want the best outcome for the birth. The fatigue has been awful and the body aches and pains bring me to tears; with all the "negative" parts of pregnancy, I'm trying to enjoy the experience.
The kids are getting pretty excited. Kyra will actually kiss my belly now and rub the baby. She tells me on a daily basis that the baby needs to come out. When I tell her the baby isn't big enough to come out, she tells me to go to the doctor and get it out. Too cute! Last week at my appointment she told the doctor to get the baby out. ;-) I just hope they continue to be so excited when she is arrives.
Being pregnant has caused my emotions to be out of control. I cry A LOT over everything: commercials, peoples comments, TV shows, etc.---lately I have been really emotional knowing that my grandparents won't be physically here when the baby is born. I went to a baby shower for a friend and she had several of her grandma's there that gave her homemade quilts, bibs, blankets--and I teared up. I'm not having a shower-but the thought of not having them around breaks my heart on almost a daily basis. I continue to have very vivid dreams (that I won't discuss on here) and I smell my grandma around my house (where there is no reason for me to smell her) often. It could be all the extra hormones that I have-I just don't know.
A couple of weeks ago I was having a really difficult day, but I try not to let the kids know. Out of the blue Tristan tells me that when people die and go to Heaven, they will come back alive later and will be with us again. (he learned this is primary) He kept telling me that Great Grandma and Great Grandpa would come back and be with us. His comment was just what I needed to hear. (of course he tied in the fact Michael Jackson would also come back and write more songs)
